tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10280905117781874762024-03-13T23:45:09.508-07:00All it takes is gutsbiffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.comBlogger232125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-38446669278276647852010-01-11T18:38:00.000-08:002010-01-11T18:42:47.219-08:00Support Shawn’s Cause…It’s 2010…do you have your Colondar, the colon cancer awareness calendar, featuring Shawn as Mr. May? If not and you would like to support an organization that provided Shawn with a truly incredible, life-affirming experience last summer, please consider purchasing a Colondar.<br /><br />You can order a Colondar online at <a href="http://www.colonclub.com/colondar.html">http://www.colonclub.com/colondar.html</a> and also read all about the amazing models that Shawn bonded with as well as see their videos. Each Colondar is only $16.50. Shawn’s story – written in his own words – is available from <a href="http://www.colonclub.com/2010May.html">http://www.colonclub.com/2010May.html</a><br /><br /><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 108px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 200px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5425677613163302786" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZmDJoV8hoB0DYgpn5KiSCvA59IvqtIruGpdoSj_THJvG0eAQ4cSQsJ5ThzsKnhiTEciuJAkgHo7vYIma-0QpBuuyYnr9gJF0FKzHaCTyeJjkQQkpNoUEznW5oYOXvD7jeDr8yYdsqRPw/s200/Shawn+Colondar.jpg" /><br /><div>If you’ve been reading Shawn’s blog for awhile, then you know he blogged about his wonderful Colondar journey. Please revisit posts from June and July 2009 <a href="http://allittakesisguts.blogspot.com/2009_06_01_archive.html">http://allittakesisguts.blogspot.com/2009_06_01_archive.html</a> </div><div><br />In Shawn’s own words (August 31, 2009)…</div><div><br />“On a personal note...Why am I selling these? Well, besides me being IN the calendar, my experience has been incredible. Colon cancer is normally an old person disease. I had joined cancer groups in DC and I was the only one with colon cancer. Then I went to the photo shoot and met 14 other people just like me. We were best friends from the instant we met. And I cannot put into words how valuable these new friends are now that I was re-diagnosed three weeks after meeting them all. Just being able to talk to people who have been there is so incredible. I want people in the future to be able to have the same experience I've had. And in order to do that, I have to help make sure the Colondar keeps going.</div><br /><div>So, if you have the means, I'd really appreciate you helping out a tremendous organization.”</div>biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-28653262766607245222009-12-23T09:33:00.000-08:002009-12-23T09:38:18.331-08:00A Poem for Shawn...All is Well - by Henry Scott-Holland<br />Recited during Shawn's memorial service/celebration:<br /><br />Death is nothing at all.<br />I have only slipped away into the next room.<br />I am I, and you are you.<br />Whatever we were to each other, that we still are.<br />Call me by my old familiar name,<br />Speak to me in the easy way which you always used.<br />Put no difference in your tone,<br />Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.<br />Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together.<br />Play, smile, think of me and if you want to, pray for me.<br />Let my name be ever the household word that it always was,<br />Let it be spoken without effect,<br />Without the trace of a shadow on it.<br />Life means all that it ever meant.<br />It is the same as it ever was;<br />There is unbroken continuity.<br />Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?<br />I am waiting for you,<br />For an interval,<br />Somewhere very near,<br />Just around the corner.<br />All is well.biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-70831436921777818332009-12-18T08:27:00.000-08:002009-12-18T09:11:53.162-08:00IMPORTANT UPDATE: SHAWN'S MEMORIAL SERVICE ON MONDAY...Due to the impending snowstorm, the memorial/celebration for Shawn has been changed.<br /><br />The celebration of Shawn Felty's life is now scheduled for MONDAY, December 21st:<br />Visitation/Viewing from 3-5 pm<br />Service 5-6:00 pm<br />Location: Demaine Funeral Home<br />520 South Washington Street Alexandria, VA 22314<br /><a href="http://www.funeralhomesguide.com/Virginia/Alexandria/DemaineFuneralHome.html">http://www.funeralhomesguide.com/Virginia/Alexandria/DemaineFuneralHome.html</a><br />703-549-0074<br /><br />There will still be a potluck reception following the service at Shawn's house. The address will be provided at the services.<br /><br />In lieu of flowers, guests may send donations to the Colon Club at <a href="http://www.colonclub.com/donate.html" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">http://www.colonclub.com/donate.html</a><br /><br />Please bring a favorite Shawn photo to add to his Christmas tree that was started at the hospital.<br />For those flying in, the funeral home has offered a code for discounted bereavement flights. Please contact Dwayne at 571-277-6151 for the number.biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-17240154377075953922009-12-17T07:30:00.000-08:002009-12-17T07:33:24.626-08:00Music for Shawn...Dear Friends of Shawn,<br /><br />This is a post on behalf of Shawn's neighbor Gale. We are putting together songs to be played during Shawn's memorial service on Saturday and need someone to download, or copy specific songs and burn the music to a CD. If you can download the music and burn it to a CD please contact me at this temporary... gmail address: AllItTakesIsGutsShawn@gmail.com with your name, number and email address. In the subject line put "Burn CD. "<br /><br />I will send you the list of songs. This needs to be completed by Friday afternoon for the funeral home. Shawn was a huge Elton John fan - but none of us can remember which songs were his favorite - if you know, please send it to me at the above email address. If you know the names of any of Shawn's favorite songs please send them to us, too. A song was sung at Michael Jackson's funeral by Usher(?) about dying too young - if anyone knows where or what that song was please let us know. Thanks so much. Gale Nemecbiffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-12135007906852267432009-12-14T19:39:00.000-08:002009-12-14T19:53:28.894-08:00Celebrate Shawn Felty...<div>A celebration of Shawn Felty's life will take place on Saturday, December 19th: </div> <div><br />Visitation/Viewing from 3-5 pm</div> <div>Service 5-6:00 pm<br /><br />Location: Demaine Funeral Home</div> <div>520 South Washington Street Alexandria, VA 22314<br />http://www.funeralhomesguide.com/Virginia/Alexandria/DemaineFuneralHome.html<br />703-549-0074<br /><br /></div> <div> </div> <div>There will be a potluck reception following the service at Shawn's house.<br /><br /></div> <div> </div> <div>In lieu of flowers, guests may send donations to the Colon Club at <a href="http://www.colonclub.com/donate.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"><span style="color: rgb(59, 89, 152);"><span>http://www.colonclub.com/d</span><wbr></span>onate.html</a><br /><br /></div> <div>Please bring a favorite Shawn photo to add to his Christmas tree that was started at the hospital.<br /><br /></div> <div> </div> <div>For those flying in, the funeral home has offered a code for discounted bereavement flights. Please contact Dwayne at 571-277-6151 for the number.</div>biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-17774746964982406082009-12-13T19:36:00.000-08:002009-12-13T19:40:17.539-08:00Knockin' on Heaven's Doors...Dear Friends of Shawn,<br /><br />It is with heavy hearts that we share the following:<br /><br />On December 13, 2009 at 4:30 pm, Shawn Felty passed peacefully surrounded by family and close friends. He was loved by many, with nearly 100 teammates, fellow actors, colleagues, cancer survivors, cancer fighters, Colondar models and friends visiting him over the last few days. For two years he battled this disease with incredible strength and extraordinary grace and he was inspiration to all who knew him. The world lost an amazing man today, but he left behind a perfect example of perseverance, fortitude and friendship.<br /><br />Memorial arrangements will be shared when plans are finalized.biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-82798614501265267152009-12-09T09:10:00.000-08:002009-12-09T09:17:06.506-08:00Update from Shawn<p>[Shawn's friend posting on his behalf to keep you updated]</p><p>Hi everyone, </p><p>Shawn wanted you to know that he is currently at Georgetown University Hospital. He has been in and out of the hospital since November 30th when he had the catheter inserted (see previous post for more details). Shawn likes to receive and read your text messages, but asks that you refrain from leaving him voicemails. Also, he is not receiving email or Facebook messages. Thanks.</p>biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-16804375333906345382009-11-29T19:06:00.000-08:002009-11-29T19:13:57.465-08:00Take my breath away...Actually, I'd prefer to have my breath given back. So tomorrow, I'm having a catheter implanted in my lung cavity. In the past two weeks, I had my lung drained twice (once for 1/2 a liter and again for over a full liter). I could continue going to the hospital for this, but for a couple of reasons it is better to get my on drain hooked up and do it myself.<br /><br />One of the reasons is that I can do it often and be able to control my breathing better. The other reason is because when I go for a drain here and there, the doc is guessing at the route that the needle has to take from my skin, through my back, past my ribs and into the cavity. The last time when I had a liter drained, 1.5 liters remained because he hit the cavity too high to drain it completely. <br /><br />This procedure will get the tube right at the bottom of my lung. They say in 60-70% of the patients, the catheter actually helps dry up the fluid and it can be removed in a few months.<br /><br />It's an out-patient procedure, so I'll be home tomorrow night (and also awake for the tube being inserted in my chest. As the Beach Boys sing, "and we'll have fun, fun, fun 'til the doctor takes the catheter away." (Okay, it wasn't exactly those lyrics!)biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-17471786000123204132009-11-25T12:07:00.000-08:002009-11-25T12:14:53.842-08:00Ice, Ice, Baby..."Oh, we need a little xmas...right this very minute..."<br /><br />I meant to post this before now, but the last week has been a mess for me. Anyhoo...Last Monday, the 16th, I attended an event in DC for cancer. It was at the Verizon Center and featured ice-skating stars and recording artists. Included were: Dorothy Hamill, Scott Hamilton, and Olivia Newton John (All three are cancer survivors.) Also there were Kristi Yamaguchi, Nancy Kerrigan, Viktor Petrenko, a few 2010 Olympic hopefuls and a couple of American Idols. <br /><br />The show will be airing Thanksgiving (short notice) on Fox at 4pm or 5pm (after the football game).<br /><br />Because I'm part of a colon cancer group, we got discounted seats. Instead of the normal $40-$100, I paid $2 each! Yep, $2. And...I was four rows from the ice. I guess cancer has it's perks. (Keep the discount...take the cancer from me.)<br /><br />The show was SO good. At age 51, Scott Hamilton was still doing back flips. Olivia Newton John sounds exactly the same. If you get a chance, check it out tomorrow.biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-81253968690755091042009-11-22T16:44:00.000-08:002009-11-22T17:28:00.353-08:00Hospital trip...<em><blockquote>He had half his liver removed. Now he's had a tube inserted into his lung cavity (while awake) to drain the fluid. He lives vicariously through himself. He is the most interesting man in the world. I never drink alcohol, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis.</blockquote></em><br /><br />Well, last weekend I was feeling a little rundown, not much of an appetite, and a headache. I made the trip to Pittsburgh to see the Panthers beat Notre Dame, but I couldn't finish my Primanti Brothers' sandwich, so the victory was missing something! I had to take a narcotic for my head after the game. The next day, I figured out that the headache was due to dehydration. I drank a few bottles of water and was okay.<br /><br />Monday came and I had a fever, so I stayed home from work. It broke later in the day and I went to a cancer event that night involving skating (stay tuned for post about that night). The event was great, but on my way home, I started feeling beyond sick. I felt awful in so many ways I didn't know what was ailing. I took some narcs and went to sleep. Tuesday was more of the fever, but not as bad as Monday night, so I thought I might be recovering. Tuesday night, it started to hurt with each breath. Not good. If I wasn't better on Wednesday, I was going to the ER.<br /><br />ER Time... In the ER, there weren't many people in the waiting room, but the back rooms were full. I waited 3.5 hours in the waiting room. I entered at 100.2 degrees and 3 hours later was 101.8. They got me back to a bed fairly quick after that.<br /><br />Saline was pumped into me to get me hydrated and they took a chest x-ray. It showed I could have pneumonia. There was fluid in my lungs, but people with cancer in their lungs can get fluid there, too. I did a CT scan to see if I had a blood clot, too. Here is the best news of the week...no blood clot! Okay, now back to crap... <br /><br />I was admitted to the hospital and pumped with saline and antibiotics (even though we didn't know if I had pneumonia). Thursday night, doctors decided to take the fluid from my lung and then test the fluid to see what it was. I asked if my visitor could stay. No, they needed it sterile. So, we began... I sat on the side of the bed and leaned over a pillow on a table in front of me. My arm was stretched over my head. At this point, the tech enters my room to get my vital signs. "Can't you do this later?" "No, I have to do it now." (What? Was she an ant? If she leaves her line, can she not find her way back? I'm having a needle jammed into my upper back. Do you think you're going to get an accurate pulse reading with a sharp instrument in me?)<br /><br />She eventually left and after using ultrasound, the lung docs found a path through my body to insert the tube. They began. It started off like they were trying to pop the most painful pimple ever on my back and they kept going...until they hit rib. I guess the ultrasound lied because they had to start over. This time worked and they sucked the liquid out. 600 ML of if. It was so gross. They said "we are going to get the most out that we can. we we get near the end, the lung will start to expand/contract and you are going to cough. I went from "fine" to coughing in no time. And I couldn't stop. I thought I might cough up that lung.<br /><br />The results came back from the testing of the gross stuff. It was not from pneumonia. It didn't mean it was from the cancer, but since I have cancer there, it's likely. In fact, I still don't know what it's from because nobody can tell me a definite answer. That is why I left the hospital. I layed there for a day and a half more will no one was doing anything bug giving me an oral antibiotic. I can that at home and not have people waking me ever hour to borrow blood, take my temp, listen to my heart, or reach in and rip out my stomach.<br /><br />Do I feel I should have left the hospital? No. But I also knew that no one there was going to do anything for me there. There were no tests lined up. I will monitor myself at home and if I need to return to the ER, I will (but at a different hospital.) 90% of what I have seen at Georgetown is a joke. I like my oncologist and my infusion nurses, but the rest of the staffs seem not to care at all. If you have something else on top of cancer, you might as well go to the local theater and see if there is a doctor in the house.<br /><br />So, my pain was cleared up via the drainage, but that was the only thing the hospital trip did for me. I know have that lovely water-retention again. My body thinks it is dehydrated and is storing water for the winter like a squirrel with nuts. My legs and abs are huge, pudgy and blobby. And maybe because of this inflated torso, I also have shortness of breath. I get winded walking stairs or anything. Then again, the shortness might be from something else, but none of the docs cared to find out.<br /><br />I'm banking that when the weight drains, I'll be able to breathe. I have to drink plenty for that to happen.<br /><br /><em><blockquote>Stay thirsty, my friends.</blockquote></em>biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-22418576971904627602009-11-06T23:58:00.000-08:002009-11-07T00:13:52.035-08:00Chemo decision...Sorry to keep you waiting on my choice of chemo drugs, but I've been lazy about blogging lately. I'm on a chemo vacation while I get ready for the next treatment. So, I've been squeezing in all kinds of things. I went to the movies four times in the past week-plus. <br /><br />And now the moment you've all been waiting for. Drumroll, please. tatatatatatatata... I chose to go with the clinical trial. Here is my thought process: The other choice was a treatment I was on right after my surgeries. That kept the cancer from coming back while I was on it. But I didn't have any signs of cancer then. So, I'm not 100% sure it would shrink the tumors I have now. Also, the clinical trial is said to have a lot less side effects. Why not give myself a chance to see if it works? Because if it does, I could take it for a long time and feel normal. Live normal. Be normal. That's all I really want, anyway, when you come down to it.<br /><br />What does the clinical trial entail? Well, every week I have to eat all green sprouts and bamboo chips and bathe in algae-filled water. Wait, wait, wait...that's not right. Ugh, I thought I was looking at the paperwork for the study, but it was a pamphlet on how to take care of your pet panda. Where did I pick up that literature? Chemo brain...I don't recall.<br /><br />Okay, here is the study's paperwork. For one week, I will take two drugs. Then I don't take anything for the next three weeks. One drug is a chemo that is proven on brain cancer and melanoma. The other is the experimental drug. That is called a PARP inhibitor. PARP is the ability for a cell to repair itself when it's damaged at the DNA level. The theory is that the chemo will work better if the cancer cells can't repair themselves. We shall see.<br /><br />I'm hopeful, worried, anxious, excited. Let's just start already. D-Day is 23 November. Here is the fun part. I have to take the pills twice a day and I can't eat or drink for two hours prior and one hour post. That is six hours a day I cannot eat or drink. For a guy trying not to lose weight every day, that stinks. And Thanksgiving is during my first week of it! I'll have to set my alarm for 1am to wake up and eat turkey and filling (It's called filling in central PA. Basically, it's bread stuffing mixed with smashed potatoes. There. I like to keep my blog educational as well as sexy and scary.)biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-463065674572234102009-10-28T18:15:00.000-07:002009-10-28T18:35:47.321-07:00Took the words out of my mouth...My newest best friend I met less than two months ago. We were part of a gathering in Little Rock, AR for the "Big Dam Walk." It was a walk for colon cancer over a big damn. A bunch of past and present Colondar models were in attendance. That included Becca (<a href="http://www.colonclub.com/2008August.html">http://www.colonclub.com/2008August.html</a>). Somehow people were just drawn to her...myself included. Anyhoo...she and I were up talking at 3am last night. (A common thing for people on chemo is insomnia.) We are both stage IV colon cancer survivors and we have a bunch in common with cancer, but it has also caused us to think a lot alike. <br /><br />I didn't know until last night that she kept a blog, too. I read an entry she wrote this week. I felt like I had dictated it to her. Her thoughts are exactly mine. And since she already put them into words, I would like to share: (either click the link to her blog or read the text below)<br /><br /><a href="http://thecolonchronicles.blogspot.com/2009/10/life-support-in-our-social-networking.html">http://thecolonchronicles.blogspot.com/2009/10/life-support-in-our-social-networking.html</a><br /><br /><em>When you are diagnosed, you have a few choices in terms of ways in which to cope. Among those choices are things like support groups, or networking groups of other people with cancer. In our social-networking-crazed world, its also easy (if almost impossible NOT) to build a community of cancery-people online. All the myriad of websites with message boards, email groups, blogs and of course...the big bad daddy of 'em all, Facebook. Over the years, I've met people who've either been through the same things I have for colon cancer, OR have had various cancers of their own but for some reason or another, we've connected and relate to each other. Sites such as The Colon Club, Imerman Angels, and Planet Cancer to name a few, have allowed me to either reach out to, or be reached by a huge network of patients/survivors/caregivers, etc. Many of these people I keep in more regular contact with via Facebook.<br />I actually have my "friends lists" in my Facebook broken down into "Colon Cancer People" and "Other Cancer People" and they're both pretty lengthy.<br />I figured it was healthy and good to have people you can vent to, and relate to in ways you never ever could to even the most well-meaning friend or family member. But inevitably, if you have a network of cancer-folk you will also lose some of those folk. And chances are, lose them to the very thing that you yourself are fighting. No matter how close you were to a person, or how long you knew them, ANY interaction in the cancer world, even a brief one, can form an intense bond.<br />I've posted on here before about someone I knew and was close to, passing away from her cancer. And in the time since then (roughly a year ago) several others I've met have passed away from it as well.<br />As of late I've been mulling over whether having this community of cancer-folk is actually a good and healthy thing after all? I recently was in an email discussion back n forth with a handful of other colon cancer survivors (of various lengths of time) and one of them made a comment about how he was glad he was finally getting "past this cancer crap" and beginning to "move on with life". It wasn't a comment directed at me specifically, but at the group as a whole. Many in the group had cancer quite a number of years ago (8, 10, 13 etc). Just those simple comments were enough to simultaneously enrage me with jealousy, and fill me with sadness and resentment.<br />I would LOVE to be able to get past cancer. I would give anything to be able to move on with life. I don't see how that is ever possible for me however. I mean, yes, I can still do other things and not dwell day to day on cancer, cancer, cancer. I can try my best to not let it consume me every minute of every hour. But ultimately the fact still remains that every day, twice a day, I have to remember to take my chemo pills. And every week, for an hour or so every week, I have to truck myself up to the burbies to get an infusion at my oncologists office. The time in between all of that, I am sometimes lucky to be able to distract myself and not think about my ultimate demise, or perhaps any of the MANY ramifications that come about from having cancer, or being on treatment. Although, successful in that as I may be, I can easily log into facebook or even just check my email and instantly be reminded about it in someway. Some friend will post about how a scan has come back clear! Or another will send a link to an awesome organization we cancery-people should know about. Or maybe there's a fundraiser, young adult cancer-mixer, or a walk/run for awareness we should support. Or...and these are the "or's" you begin to dread: You randomly happen upon a friends profile page in passing only to realize from the comments posted that a person who, not more than a week prior, you were reading about them celebrating a 27th birthday...or who that VERY day you had just addressed a birthday card to send to her, belated of course...apparently just passed away the day before. I don't know whats more sad, the fact that someone you know just died way too young and for not a good enough reason...or the fact that you find out on a website...or the fact that its not all that uncommon of an thing.<br />I begin to think about how if I didn't know all these people...all these wonderful, amazing, remarkable, hilarious, strong, intelligent, accomplished, loving, kind people...that I wouldn't have nearly as much sadness and sorrow. To be fair, with or without knowing them, I have my fair share of it. But with knowing all of these new friends, I've expanded the potential for grief many times over. So is that good for your psyche? Is it healthy and healing to have to continuously face the end result to things in which you yourself are facing? In the same respect if I ignored all these new friends. If i disassociated myself from all the organizations I've connected to that do so much towards cancer-support...is that any healthier? Would denial be any better of a way to cope? Common knowledge would lead me to think no. But I would be remiss if I did not admit that I don't always believe common knowledge knows what the hell it's talking about!! Of course, ultimately, there isn't a right or wrong answer. However, I'd love to hear others thoughts on this matter.</em>biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-39155715939151964192009-10-27T16:07:00.000-07:002009-10-27T16:16:57.698-07:00What to wear for Halloween...Well, I got the results of my CT scan yesterday. It wasn't the shrinkage I was hoping for. Instead the tumors have grown...just slightly, but still. Also, there are a couple more. None of this is great news. But it's not a disaster. I have options. <br /><br />One of the options is a clinical trial. This particular trial doesn't have any data to go by other than it worked in testing on animals, and they figured out the dosage needed. So I'd be stage three of the trial. The good news is that this combo of drugs doesn't seem to have any side effects. And I'd only do it for two months and then we would scan. If it isn't working, I could try the next option.<br /><br />Another option I have is the drug treatment I was on after my surgeries. That "seemed" to work, but who really knows. The surgery removed the tumors and the chemo simply kept it from coming back for a year. But were things just starting to grow from nothing while I was on it?<br /><br />So which do I choose? I wanted my biggest decision this week to be my Halloween costume, but instead I have to choose a drug that might work and save my life. I can't wait until the day when "What should I have for lunch?" is back in my thoughts.<br /><br />I'm still here, so "We have one more game!"biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-1835136758631993032009-10-19T13:22:00.000-07:002009-10-19T13:28:05.034-07:00Colondar sales...I gotta say that I think being on chemo is a great marketing idea! My goal is to sell 300 Colondars and I'm at 220, now. But, now is the tougher sell. Most people I know who want one have already bought one. If you are one of those people who want one, but haven't told me...then let me know! Eighty to go!!!<br /><br />The money goes for a couple of things...colon cancer awareness and also to support the next Colondar. Being part of the Colondar has helped me SO much. Three weeks after meeting all these people who have been in my situation, I was diagnosed with my recurrence. I can't tell you how much that has helped me. So, I'm asking you to help me help someone else. If you are looking for a holiday gift, Colondars are great!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPJ_hY-Yt16w0eu1_Xo0zLF3Ht3VpsWFugGywP9xveW0ajPDZt_Z6WUw3YIQv7RZ7hhyanNP_P2uQqaAUkyLe_0VmZYHwx7et-a2rR0X_w2PXvay5dqA0vIaIVIRexY9L8lWCUmRdQN04/s1600-h/stack.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 313px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPJ_hY-Yt16w0eu1_Xo0zLF3Ht3VpsWFugGywP9xveW0ajPDZt_Z6WUw3YIQv7RZ7hhyanNP_P2uQqaAUkyLe_0VmZYHwx7et-a2rR0X_w2PXvay5dqA0vIaIVIRexY9L8lWCUmRdQN04/s320/stack.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394410396852791954" /></a>biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-64438568446353764822009-10-16T15:03:00.000-07:002009-10-16T15:06:13.576-07:00Kind words...I get very nice email notes from time to time. I thought I'd share a couple I got this week. Obviously, they made me cry. I cry at Campbell's soup commercials, for crying out loud!<br /><br /><em><blockquote>Hey, I got my calendar and visited your blog. I was really charmed, moved, entertained, saddened, inspired, etc. by all you write and have written about your experience. You really are such a gift to the earth. I mean that. People with your fortitude and strength of character are rare. GO, FIGHT, WIN!!! </blockquote></em><br /><br /><em><blockquote>Now you are not only our hero but our celebrity too. Its a cool Colondar and I will be showing it to my doctor. You keep up the good work, we are in it with you. We tell all of our friends about your strength and resolve, your positive attitude. Guess you're just one special Dude. We are proud of you.</blockquote></em>biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-91847231085559372832009-10-14T20:11:00.000-07:002009-10-14T20:16:52.223-07:00Worrisome things...There are a few things I've noticed lately. One is that my hair is growing back on my head. Another is that the rash is getting better. Both of these things worry me. If the chemo is not causing my hair to fall out and it's not causing a rash, then is it working on the cancer?!? I have a CT scan on 26 October to find out.<br /><br />On the other hand (or leg), my leg hair is falling out. I'm bald on my knees, thighs and calves. The rest of the legs are hairy. I feel like the GEICO caveman. Well, I guess any, old caveman. I'm just picturing one wearing modern clothes.<br /><br />Either the open pours from the hair loss or the dry skin from the one chemo drug is causing pain. It feels like sunburn with every step, as my pants/jeans rub against my legs. That's a boat-load of joy!biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-77125137223720472022009-10-09T04:49:00.000-07:002009-10-09T04:58:00.298-07:00I'm not normal...My doctor said that I'm not normal. (Frankly, I'm surprised no medical expert has said that in the previous 39 years.) He didn't say it in so many words. You see, I had my routine oncology visit and while we were talking, he had this puzzled look and asked, "did you SHAVE your head?" "Yeah." "Weird. None of my other patients on (my chemo) have ANY hair." <br /><br />Actually, in the past two weeks I've notice my hair seems to be coming back. And it's black! Watch...it'll be curly and I'll have an afro. If so, I'm going to grow it high and do a "Kid and Play" haircut! <br /><br />The doctor went on with our typical questions. "So, how much Imodium are you taking?" "None." "Really?" So, I have Crohn's Disease and colon cancer, plus I'm on chemo and I don't have excessive diarrhea any more. I can vouch that I'm a weirdo! Well, maybe this is deceiving. I've had Crohn's for 20 years and diarrhea was the norm. So, what most people consider a problem while on chemo, I might be used to. Who knows.<br /><br />One side effect I am starting to get...extremely dry skin (which leads to that rash). But lately it's been dry arm. The skin hurts to touch around my triceps...feels like sunburn. And the skin around my elbows is turning into "old man skin" as my cousin says. I'm wrinkly! So weird. Yes, I'm a freak! :-)biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-10879153511903411862009-09-29T18:36:00.000-07:002009-09-29T18:44:32.287-07:00The tide turned tonight...Over the weekend, I ventured to Raleigh, NC for the Pitt/NC State football game. I stayed with a friend of mine and also about 10 people from DC made the trip. So, I got to hang out with everyone. It was a lot of fun despite the rain throughout the entire game and the fact that Pitt had a big lead, but ended up losing. When I came home, I worked Monday and Tuesday. Monday night I went to see the movie, "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs." I laughed a lot! Tonight I played softball along the Potomac River and was shivering in the cold wind.<br /><br />So, I dealt with rain, meatballs, and wind all in the past few days. But, I loved every minute of it.<br /><br />Tonight after softball, I made my ordinary Tuesday night trip to the grocery store to pick up my chemo staples (bland, soft food that is high in calories). While carting down the aisle, I lost it. The tears just kept coming. As you have read, I cry often. But tonight was different. This cry was because I don't want to head to chemo tomorrow. I have felt so good the past few days and now it has to end -- as it does every two weeks. <br /><br />I normally try not to think about it at all and just show up at the infusion center pretending to be naive about what will occur (if that makes any sense). But it got the best of me tonight. Even as I type this, my eyes are soggy. It just sucks only feeling good for eight out of every 14 days.biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-15800275736241242602009-09-23T19:14:00.000-07:002009-09-23T19:23:16.044-07:00They'rrrrrre Heeeee-eerrrre...Remember that line from the little girl in "Poltergeist?" (Trivia: She died of Crohn's Disease.)<br /><br />Anywho...in the past five days, I've had old friends come to town from Philadelphia, Atlanta, Jersey City, and Berlin! I had the chance to spend time with three of the four (just too tired to squeeze everyone in...sorry, you-know-who.) Three just happened to be working in DC this week. Why did they all pick a week I was dead from chemo??? :-)<br /><br />And now I want to return the favor and visit each of them! I see trips to Independence Hall, The Varsity, Madison Square Garden, and a concentration camp in my future. All four of those things are related to two of my favorite subjects...college sports and history. Sure the last one sounds morbid, but as you know, I cry all the time anyway, right?biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-68165192354325927432009-09-16T18:33:00.000-07:002009-09-16T18:51:28.856-07:00What am I thinking?Do you wonder about that? Well, today was my long chemo day at the hospital. I woke up at 6:30am to leave by 7am for my 7:30am appointment. The first think that happens is that the nurse "accesses my port." In English, she sticks a needle into my surgically implanted device in my upper chest. We count to three together so I can take a deep breath. It's not that it hurts THAT much, but nobody wants a needle jammed into their breast.<br /><br />She draws blood and then I wait and wait for the blood test results to see if I can even have chemo today based on my blood counts. When I was on chemo last year, I would just lay in the bed and wait. I no longer do that. I take the stairs down 4 flights to the donut shop. (I hate elevators and I need the calories...they work against each other, i know.) Then I talk to other patients. This go-around, I'm trying to remain more normal than before.<br /><br />I felt bad today. One guy (maybe around 30-35) was in a chemo bed and it was his first time. He was holding his significant other's hand and his mom was there, too. I could tell he was scared. I thought about talking to him, but they drew their privacy curtain. If I see him again, I have to say hi.<br /><br />The blood tests came back and I was on the low side, but still cleared for chemo. The pre-meds are first. Two Tylenol and then IV Benedryl. Talk about loopy! It's a great drunk feeling. (I'd like to say without the hangover, but I'd take a hangover over my next few days any time!) <br /><br />Then the chemo starts. I'm asleep for most of it. I have to wake up to pee every so often. And when I do, my clothes are wet. It makes me sweat. And it's not like I get to shower to clean up...I take home the IV pump for 46 hours and I can't shower while that is still connected. Also, another cool effect of the drugs I get is that my calf muscles start to spasm. They actually look like aliens are trying to find their way out of my legs. It's so gross!<br /><br />Later, at home (in other words, now)...I feel just plain weird. I have to keep food in my mouth most of the time or I know I'll puke. But the trick is finding the right foods because a lot of different things will make me puke. It's not easy.<br /><br />I would love to be in the movie "Click" with Adam Sandler. I would fast forward the remote control 4 days and be back to almost normal. The chemo effects always linger until you completely stop the drugs, but after 4 or 5 days, they aren't so bad. So, sometimes I sleep because I'm worn out. Other times I sleep just to pass the time and not realize that I feel like complete crap.<br /><br />I also try to do things to get my mind off of it. For instance, on Saturday morning, I'll try to meet up with my running group and run/walk. Also, tomorrow, I'll go to keep score for my one softball team. That takes my mind off everything. Sometimes, that is all you can do.<br /><br />I like to think that I am doing everything I can. I received a note from my sister, Shannon, today. I'd like to share because it made me cry: <br /><br /><em>Do you remember when you said you liked the song, "I Hope You Dance" by Lee Ann Womack? There is a line, "When you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance." Dear brother, you are dancing.</em>biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-91933972544872396012009-09-16T12:54:00.000-07:002009-09-16T13:00:17.661-07:00Someone in the know...I was at the infusion center today for chemo. I overheard a girl talking about how her cancer is back as of this month. Based on the drugs she was taking, I knew it was colon cancer, so I introduced myself and started talking. <br /><br />We both had stage IV colon cancer. And now we both have mets (it spread) to the liver and lungs. I told her, "stay right there. I want to show you something."<br /><br />When I came back, she immediately said, "Oh you have a Colondar!" <br /><br />"You've heard of it?"<br /><br />"Of course. I'm on <a href="http://coloncancersupport.colonclub.com/viewforum.php?f=1">Colon Talk</a> all the time!"<br /><br />"Well, I'm in it!"<br /><br />She looked at my page and said, "yes! I read your bio online and watched your video. I was about to order one, but I'll get one from you."<br /><br />Does one person knowing of me make me famous? :-)biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-11092003408742454742009-09-15T05:58:00.000-07:002009-09-15T06:03:25.537-07:00"Ditto"I woke up this morning and read my Facebook page. It was littered with quotes from Ghost and Dirty Dancing, so I knew right away what had happened. I'm sorry to hear about Patrick Swayze. Pancreatic cancer is one of the worst you can get. There are no symptoms, so usually when it's found, it's too late. But Swayze kept acting until the end. Gotta do what you want to do!<br /><br />Also, I'll leave you with a light-hearted note... My debit card expired, so they sent me a new one. I cut up the old one and when I went to use the new one, the ATM said it was expired. I cut up the new one! Damn chemo brain!biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-47129297632192636882009-09-04T16:11:00.000-07:002009-09-04T16:17:17.387-07:00Doh!OMG...so much has been happening this week that I totally forgot to post that I got my CT scan results last week! As you know, I had seven cancer nodules. A few got ever so slightly smaller and a few got ever so slightly bigger. The radiology report classifies this as no change or "stable disease." That is all the doc hoped for in the first two months. So, the chemo is doing what it's supposed to. In three months prior, we went from no cancer to seven nodules and in less than two months we stopped that growth of all of them. All good news.<br /><br />Sure, I wanted shrinkage, but I'm greedy. But I live on. Or as I've stated in my previous softball blog (something I've kinda adopted as my new motto): "We have one more game." :-)<br /><br />And I still owe you guys a blog about my trip to Little Rock for the Big Dam Walk. I'll get to that soon!biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-36382867938538656952009-09-04T09:58:00.000-07:002009-09-04T10:00:41.922-07:00Colondar Video...One of our models, Miss October (Evelyn Reyes), has her on TV show "Boston Latino TV." They created this video...<br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDs5FZsTtvk">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDs5FZsTtvk</a>biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1028090511778187476.post-83664229666881235012009-08-31T20:51:00.000-07:002009-08-31T21:19:00.155-07:002010 Colondar has debuted! I'm Mr. May!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhL10_MfsJ4MzOAGQBb5Hqw6OWid-yjRNNcKURtdN214O9W8291hbjRZfNG4wITwk4L1OlRzAGvqYaGPM-slDGV52MZumwfRgB2tyTpEIxLTz17__uJprWJUB6iA7dtRTD4WaU4cWVZFo/s1600-h/2010cover.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhL10_MfsJ4MzOAGQBb5Hqw6OWid-yjRNNcKURtdN214O9W8291hbjRZfNG4wITwk4L1OlRzAGvqYaGPM-slDGV52MZumwfRgB2tyTpEIxLTz17__uJprWJUB6iA7dtRTD4WaU4cWVZFo/s320/2010cover.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5376347250542567170" /></a><br />I know you have been waiting all your life for it! Okay...well, probably not. But, the colon cancer awareness calendar that I'm in is now available for purchase. How do I get my hands on one, you ask? Well, there are two ways. One is to order online: <a href="http://www.colonclub.com/colondar.html">http://www.colonclub.com/colondar.html</a><br /><br />The other way (and my personal favorite) is to order one from me if you are local. That way, I can personalize it for you. Just email me and we'll figure out how to get it to you. <br /><br />Online, they are $16.50. I'm asking $20 for the ones I'm selling. That's totally up to you, but it makes transactions easier and I'm donating the extra $3.50 to the Colon Club. (You can also donate more, if you like.)<br /><br />You can read the stories of the models and (soon) view videos of each of us talking about our experiences: <a href="http://www.colonclub.com/2010models.html">http://www.colonclub.com/2010models.html</a><br /><br />On a personal note...Why am I selling these? Well, besides me being <strong>IN</strong> the calendar, my experience has been incredible. Colon cancer is normally an old person disease. I had joined cancer groups in DC and I was the only one with colon cancer. Then I went to the photo shoot and met 14 other people just like me. We were best friends from the instant we met. And I cannot put into words how valuable these new friends are now that I was re-diagnosed three weeks after meeting them all. Just being able to talk to people who have been there is so incredible. I want people in the future to be able to have the same experience I've had. And in order to do that, I have to help make sure the Colondar keeps going.<br /><br />So, if you have the means, I'd really appreciate you helping out a tremendous organization.biffmhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10730470608117712416noreply@blogger.com3